Oct 22, 2006

Past Injuries.... Part IV

     OK, I’m sick and tired of recalling the times I got hurt; a guy dwells on that stuff too long and pretty soon you’re in the fetal position on Dr. Freud’s sofa, babbling about how the ATM machines are stealing your brain.  So, here is one of many stories about how those around me got hurt, sometimes by my actions, although never by my intentions. 

 

     The first one that comes to mind was the first time I was really, really scared while working.  It started in the County Jail receiving area.  I was helping another officer book a heroin addict.  You actually don’t see too many of these any more; heroin has been replaced by methamphetamine, a drug that is preferred I think because prolonged use negates the need to buy expensive toothpastes and brushes, as it makes your teeth rot quickly. 

 

     Anyway, here is this doper, getting booked for something, and I was standing behind him.  All of a sudden, this guy goes nuts!  I have no idea why, maybe cause he could not get the in-room Jacuzzi upgrade, or maybe because the ATMs had just taken too many brain cells.  The guy yells out at the other officer, and then takes a swing at him.  I grabbed the guy’s long, greasy hair (which reminded me of a filthy mop that needed to be replaced during the Carter administration) and pulled hard. 

 

     What I did not know is that the other officer, doing a great job of ducking the haymaker, had gone low and grabbed the guy around his legs and lifted.  My pulling high and his lifting low had the cumulative effect of flipping this guy like a burning pancake.  I saw his feet come up, and some of the dirty hair came out in my hands, I then heard his head hit the concrete floor like a rotten pumpkin thrown from a bridge. 

 

      Time sort of went still for a moment, and then the only thing my brain registered was how much blood was coming out from under his very still head.  I could only think: “Oh, my Lord, we killed him!”  I was certain that the world was one heroin addict less, and that I was going to jail for murdering Mr. Mophead.  Just then, I heard the sweetest sound ever; Mr. Mop rolled his eyes and said, “I ain’t gonna resist any more.”  Those were his exact words. 

 

     I was so happy that I clapped my partner on the shoulder and said, “He’s OK!”  My partner just looked at me and said, “Ya right, everyone’s supposed to have blood pouring out of their head like that.”  OK, he was bleeding pretty good, but at least he was alive. 

 

     I saw him in court a few days later; some stitches were in his head, right about the same place where he was missing a large patch of hair. 

 

 

Oh look, an example of shameless self-promotion:

 

       

16 comments:

siennastarr said...

Love your stories Dave!  Congrats on your nominations!

Jackie

psychfun said...

Hey, don't knock it. I saw Freud's couch at the Museum (traveling exhibit) & it looked quite comfy! HA! Well, I'd say that is great team work! So were you "really really scared" because you thought you would be in trouble because you thought you killed him?

screaminremo303 said...

HA!  Don't you just love it when people decide to get froggy in the County Jail?

Did you forget to yell "STOP RESISTING! STOP RESISTING!!" as he was hitting the floor?

emabecmar said...

here in philadelphia, pa, heroine is now the most popular choice of drug. what a waste of money for such poiso to put in your body huh. have a good day.
Cindy

ladeeoftheworld said...

A rotten pumpkin hitting the concrete........I've heard that sound many times.  Isn't it the most memorable noise you've ever heard?  Mushy human heads. It almost makes me throw up in my mouth.

reconcilinglife said...

Great story again.. Congrats on nominations. Bam

mllevl said...

Time you had cushion floor laid over that concrete  ........  Eve

nelishianatl said...

And the sad part was....
He was probably already so self medicated it didn't hurt nearly as bad as it looked like it did.
NELISHIA
http://journals.aol.com/nelishianatl/WISHINGANDHOPING/

rebuketheworld said...

You hear about the cops who get killed but you dont hear about their injuries on the job...its good that your bringing light to this truth...Cops dont always get pictured as the good guys but arent we lucky, that a phone call away, there is help...Great entry...and congratulations! -Raven

fisherkristina said...

You can make any story funny!  And that one was funny!

Anyway, I surfed in to check out the other VIVI nominees.  I just want to say congrats on your VIVI nominations.  

Krissy
http://journals.aol.com/fisherkristina/SometimesIThink

bgilmore725 said...

so it was all your fault. <grin>

Bea

ravenjuiced said...

Wow, I'm almost afraid to post a comment on here, particularly on this entry, having done my share in my youth. But this is a very cool entry and journal. Uh, while ATM machines never stole my brain, I did watch my face turn into a Picasso painting in the mirror once. I think I'll enjoy reading through this journal.

Fred

davethesod said...

Hi...

Find out what made a grown man scream like a little girl, when I camped out last night for Halloween.

Make sure you've got a cushion to hide behind and then watch the video here:

http://journals.aol.co.uk/davethesod/mish-mash/

tpiez4me said...

The 3 stooges came to mind..........

lanurseprn said...

Great story and congrats on the nominations!
Pam

lacaza3 said...

yes I know what you mean i deal with plastic surgery patients and i think they are just as wakkey as druggies.You never know what they are going to do or be pissed off about
Donna In TEXAS